Most of us, I think, would like to believe that we don’t judge other people.
I do.
I don’t care if you’re yellow or green with purple spots. Nor do I judge people based on their body size. I don’t measure people by their girth. Good grief, not when I’m attempting to rid myself of the last of my girth.
However, if a guy wears a bandanna, a leather jacket, has a bald head, huge sunglasses, and has a chain coming out of his pocket, I’m going to think he belongs to a motorcycle gang. If a kid is carrying a can of spray paint, and the wall has just been tagged, I’m going to think he did it. If a customer service person has an attitude from: “Hello”, I’m going to think that this might not be a good phone call.
Life is a series of judgments based on our experiences. We all have a little mental notebook against which we check behaviors, body types, and other identifying marks. It’s how we get through life.
I also believe that this mental notebook can be altered. A page can be removed and replaced by different criteria and experiences. For example, if an Adopt-a-Kitten program started here that was attended by bald men in motorcycle jackets, stainless steel teeth, and crocodile boots, I’m more apt to associate that appearance, the next time, with guys who like soft, purring kittens.
The danger, if think is not in judging, but in refusing to change the criteria. Or refusing to learn from experience. Or refusing to change our minds.
How about you? Have you changed your mind recently about something?
Good Morning, back later.
yep,I was working 0n the butterfly garden and 3 teens, big kids, low hanging pants walking on the street toward where i was .They looked like thugs….In 2 seconds I felt unsafe all do to what they looked like .was moving closer to my door.Next thing I know one was talking real polite to me and told me my garden was nice . They all said bye as they walked past I felt like a dope and they now greet me everytime they see me . But I’m afraid I will still use caution next time as the time I think warm and fuzzy I’ll be wrong again in the other direction. I’ll still give anyone a chance to be other than an impression but I will always temper with a large dose of caution.
I find as I’m getting older, will be 60 in September, that I try to give everyone a chance and not judge them as each day some things are on our minds I don’t know what they are thinking nor am I walking in their shoes! if at work they are late all the time ,not my business, if leave early and not doing the job , not my place to say a word. It is up to management to run the business. Agatha
This is an interesting topic. When my younger daughter was a teenager she liked to receive an Amy Brown faerie calendar for Christmas. The one place I was sure to find it was Hot Topics. Now if you have never been in a Hot Topics it can appear to be a bit scary with all the Goth ware and such. Then there is the sale force. Strange hairstyles in a rainbow of colors, the body piercings and the tattoos, oh my! Well let me tell you I have never had such good service as I have had in that chain of stores. Kind, courteous and knowledge about there stock these sales associates have always taken care of me and sent me on my way a satisfied customer.
Then there was the time I was in the Downtown Crossing T station waiting for a redline train back to Quincy. There was this young couple also waiting. The young man had a thin bat and shoved it down his pant leg. Now the question was do I get in the same car has they are in, he is armed. Or do I make sure I am in a different car because he could be a trouble maker. I picked the different car. Always interesting to ride the Boston T.